Postponed Apocalypse: A Lookback at 2012

First up, let me congratulate all of us for surviving the end of the world! Yipee! No, seriously, we should be thankful.

Okay. So it's that time of year again when all I can think about is fast-forwarding the days so I can start anew. I've always believed that New Year isn't just celebrated because it's a tradition that has to keep going. For me, New Year symbolizes new beginning -- the opportunity to be on track again despite all the bad things, wrong decisions or problems you've had from the past year. It's like starting all over again from a clean slate trying to apply all the lessons you've learned from all your experiences from the previous year.  

If I am to describe my 2012, I'd probably say that it wasn't the best year but not even the worst, though. Yeah, I am (still) broke, jobless and drifted but I didn't struggle that much to live a day of my life. I mean, thanks to my family who's always been so supportive of me. And while most people would think that it's fun being a total bum, it's not! Spending most of your time doing nothing but thinking about how a day will go is sooooo boring! I did try looking for jobs out there but I guess I'm just too OC that I want my next job to be perfect just like my previous one. It's like I'm looking for the love of my life and without that "spark" I'm looking for, it will never work out.  And so later on, I got tired of searching and just stick to me and my siblings' "master plan" (which, by the way, is a secret! LOL). Luckily, I got the Internet, TV, and a few events with friends and family that got me busy with and kept me sane while waiting for 2013. Haha! 

Basically, 2012 was my year for reflection. This year, I got to realize a lot of things about myself and life. One of the most important things that I've realized is that I AM BLESSED. When we're down, we tend to see everything negatively that we forget to count our blessings. I think it's just natural to be depressed for a certain period but things won't change if you'll continue to be like that, right? We all go through tough times. I'm just so proud of myself because I have developed this attitude to not dwell on the negative side of things but instead acknowledge the blessings that God had and has been showering me for the last 27 years. He may have led me to a blurry path for now but I know that this is all part of His plan. Prayers are the best way to deal with all the worries you have and just bear in mind that the situation where you are right now is just a phase. It will pass eventually. I am just so thankful for the gift of health, love and harmony in the family and that we were not affected by all the major catastrophes that happened in the country.

Another major blessing this year was the birth of an angel we call Gian, my first nephew. And I am just so glad that I was there when he was born. He's turning two months in a few weeks and the excitement to see him grow up is always there. He's one of the reasons why I so want to get back to work again and earn so I can buy him stuff and spoil him with things that he would probably want. Haha! I love him!

Anyway, I also turned 27 this year and at my age, I really should be investing and saving for the future. My priorities shifted from "earning for pleasure" to "earning for the future" and I hope that this won't change even when I'm already busy with my next job. Dang! I wish that's soon! 

This year also, I had to refrain from dieting and going to the gym for a while since my mom isn't happy with my thinness anymore. Just when I'm about to have abs already! Kidding! Haha! But, yeah, I'm trying to gain a few pounds right now so I that I can start a new and more effective workout program maybe mid next year when I'm already settled (hopefully) with my new job.

On my love life, well, my relationships with music and TV and the Internet are okay so I guess I'm good. Haha! Crap! 

Alright. I guess that's about it for my 2012 and I am already sleepy. I didn't even plan on blogging tonight but I'm glad I did because it felt really good. :)  

Happy New Year!  2013 will be fantastic and I am claiming it!

On Pragmatism and Focus

Fit as a fiddle but my mind has been restless these past few days. I dunno, but the more I stay at home and do nothing, the more I'm urged to go out and be busy. Boredom kills and the fact that my allowance is limited is also something to worry about. Haha! 

Well, I guess I'd have to deal with my current situation for quite some time until I finally get back to work. 

Problem is, WHERE'S WORK?! Haha! 

It's been a month now since I came back from that SG journey and I am still a bum. It's not that I didn't have job interviews or offers. In fact, I've had five already and even turned down one sure job opportunity in search of a better option (the rest, I'm still waiting). I don't know if that's another bad decision but all I know is that if you think you deserve better, then push for it; go for the best. I just hope that God won't get tired of giving me chances and won't punish me for being too choosy. ILY, Lord! :) 

When I asked my mom earlier, "Nay, san kaya next kong work?," she told me, "Sa kangkungan!" and I was like, "Ang supportive nyo lang ha!" And we both laughed. I know she wanted to stress something to me with those words. That's what I like about my mom. She knows how to live life. I know that she feels what I feel but makes it a point not to miss out on the "magical moments" a day brings. Unlike me who thinks a lot about the future and ends up frowning. Haha!  

To a certain extent, I think I get what she implied. I've been given options but when something concrete's about to materialize, I change my mind and challenge myself even more. I don't see anything wrong with being ambitious but I guess I also need to be pragmatic. Wonders don't happen in a snap. If I wanna get THERE, I have to start SOMEWHERE! 

Realigning my career was one. Finding a training ground is another. My previous employment , although a happy one, had its flaws, too. My job title didn't match the things that I was actually doing for the organization. Crazy, huh? Yeah. Long story, though. Now, I chose to penetrate the Communications World where I know I should be and it has been a challenge for me to explain every now and then to new employers about what I used to do. But that's that and I have to deal with it.   

So far, I'm still hopeful that I'll land my envisioned job soon and in a company that will really exhaust my talents. I know I have a lot to give. A chance is all I need.